So, I just got back from Denver today. Wow! I never thought I could cram so much into such a short trip! Well, I guess I could have tried to stick more into the schedule. I'm glad I didn't! I'm REALLY tired right now! But, I'm at work tonight, covering for someone who was sick. So, I've got time to update the blog! I'm getting better at updating this thing! Yay for updates!
So, let me explain my trip. I scheduled the trip to take a fire test in Denver. The test is used by twelve different departments to draw from when they're looking for candidates to hire. I went out for a test that took me about an hour and a half to take. But I got there on Saturday night and left early Tuesday morning. A bit expensive but definitely worth it! I got in Saturday and hung out with my buddies and some of his friends that he grew up with. Sunday was full of church and meetings and home teaching. It was fun to see how the church is run out there in comparison with where I'm at. Not any differences in the doctrine. Just in the way people handle the situations in their current circumstances and environment. Interesting to watch how people act/react to life's experiences. The singles ward out there was neat. A lot of good members. Even a few cute girls I could enjoy getting to know a little better! Monday was test day, so I wasn't up too late Sunday night. Like I mentioned before, the test only took me an hour and a half. I wasn't the first one to finish. But, I was within a few minutes of him. After the test, I went out to eat with my buddy Preston and his family. Then, I relaxed for an hour or so before I picked up Preston from work and went to see his dad's training center. Quite a sight! Their fire district spent about $19 million for the fire training facility. It was totally worth it, though! It is a state-of-the-art facility with several classrooms, great fire props, and plenty of space to practice. I'm jealous! I would love to train at a facility like that! Wow! It's amazing! After the tour, Preston and I went home and ate before his FHE. Their FHE activity was glow-in-the-dark basketball which was kinda fun. I wish more people had shown up but I was happy to play with those that did. Then, I hit the sack early so I could wake up in time and not miss my flight. Kinda a whirlwind of a trip. But, it was fun! I really liked Denver! Was there anything specific that drew me there? Not that I can recall. I just really like the area and town. I have some strange attraction to the area. Really can't place a finger on what draws me to that area. I just know it's something I need to investigate and pursue. We'll see if I get a job out there or not! I haven't heard any specifics as to whether any of the twelve departments will hire or not. There were a couple maybes but no definite plans by any of them to hire in the near future. Let's hope they do! I wouldn't mind working in the Denver area!
As far as other updates in my life...
I voted today! Yay for voting! It's weird to think how passionate I was about voting this year. Over the last few months, I've done a lot of researching on candidates and issues. By no means did I become an expert on any specific subject matter. I did learn a lot about what I believe and possibly what others believe. Needless to say, I felt it was very important for me to vote. I've never been one to really discuss politics. I think it brings out too much contention and anger when people talk about it. I've had only a handful of calm, non-confrontational discussions when politics and opinions about such are brought up. I guess that's why I've always avoided the topic. So, I voted today. Felt I voted for those I could support in office. Some of my votes were rewarded with helping someone gain or stay in office. Others didn't. Some of the issues and propositions that I voted on didn't go my way, either. But, the majority of the people spoke and so I will make the most of what will be done. It will be another interesting two years. I hope the right people were elected to bring about the change that this state and country need. However, I'm a bit skeptical as to whether or not these candidates will follow through on their promises. I think we're in for another long two years of difficulties and strife. But then, I may just be too jaded...
Work is still work. For being slow, we're still quite busy. Not anything like what we've been before, but we're not dead quiet yet. I'm glad to see guests around. It gives me something to do. Intermission will be difficult. Not sure how I'll entertain myself for the several hours of nothingness that will be my shifts for the rest of this month. I'm glad to have a job; don't get me wrong. But, there are some issues that I wish would get resolved. How to bring about change in an atmosphere that sticks to the norms and fights change? I'm up for any ideas!
Family life is still difficult. Not really much I can do except pray...
Trying to keep my promise to myself and go on one date per week. Haven't done one yet this week and the week is almost half over. Better get on it! Several girls (both new and old) that I'd love to take out! We'll see how I do in asking them out...
Music has become a stronger passion in my life as of late. I've begun examining why I like certain genres more than others. As well, I've been trying to listen to the lyrics more often and try to understand what they're saying. I guess that's why I'm becoming more and more a country fan. I usually consider myself a mood guy, listening to whatever music suits my mood. But, country music has seemed to dominate my listening as of late. Am I becoming old and weird? Maybe. Am I overly concerned about it? Definitely not.
Well, that's enough rambling for the night. Now, to get ready for the rest of the morning!!!
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Friday, October 29, 2010
Random ramblings...
Wow! Another week has come and gone. And what do I have to show for it? Hmm...that's an interesting question. Let me see...
The beginning of the week started out normal. Church services were great, as always. Good talks and lessons. Definitely need to continually improve and get better. FHE was good. Should have stayed longer but I scheduled a date that night, too. Didn't think FHE would go so long! So, I bailed a bit earlier than expected so I wouldn't be late on a date (Hey! I rhymed!). The date was good. Still have a hard time reading that girl! Not sure if she's interested in going on more dates or not. When I'm with her, it's great! She's so kind and seems interested. But, communicating with her by other means than face-to-face gives me the impression she's not into me as much as I may be into her. Oh well! I'm taking the philosophy of asking until I get a definitive "No" or something to that effect. I'll keep you updated on that. Training at the fire department was fun. We just watched a bunch of training videos to prepare for this weekend's extrication and fire drills. That'll be lots of fun! Did get stuck up at the station for a bit while waiting for the plows to clear the roads. We got a good dumping of snow Tuesday night which continued until Wednesday afternoon. It's weird that it happened so early in the year. Must be global warming (*snicker*)! There weren't any accidents to respond to, though. I'm not sure if I'm happy about that or not. Country dancing was fun! I do enjoy dancing more that I ever thought I would. I invited some of my friends who don't normally go to join me. Only one ended up showing up. I'm glad she showed up. I didn't think she would. She's a busy girl and has lots to do. But it was great that she showed up! A bit perplexed about the whole scenario, but that's a topic I'll have to discuss in private and not on this blog. At least, not in specifics! I also had a job interview on Wednesday with an ambulance service. It's not the ideal job I wanted with my certifications. However, it does pay better than my current job. And, it will be another reference to add to my resume to help land my dream job. That's a definite plus! As well, it will help me pursue a few potential options here in Utah while I try to figure out my interest in these girls while I still have time. The HR lady says they plan on hiring someone. Not really thinking they'll hire a paramedic since they're full of them. But, they are trying to add more to their department. So, that's good. She made it sound like I am their first option when it comes time to hire. But then I've been wrong about that before (South Jordan). Only time will tell what the outcome may be! And that wraps up the week thus far. Have work Friday night, training all day on Saturday, and then fly out to Denver for a job application that night. Will spend Halloween in Denver, which should prove to be interesting. I'll fly back from Denver on Tuesday, just in time to vote. It's weird that I feel such an urge to vote in this election. I feel much more passionate about this election than I have in years past. Why? I can't really point my finger at it. Nevertheless, I will vote and make my voice heard!
Okay. So that's my life for the past week. It sounds rather boring when I reread it. Sorry! Sleep deprivation seems to make me more blunt and less creative. I guess that's what I get for staying up so late and getting up so early! I wish I could get on a more regular schedule! But alas, I want to play too much and yet still have to work to make a living. So, I'll sneak in what little sleep I can when I can find the time to do so. But it appears that may be getting harder and harder to do if I keep taking on so much. Oh! Here are some other updates in my life!
Family - Things are good here. It was Teri and Daniel's birthdays today. Couldn't get ahold of either, so I left them voicemail messages. Hope they got them! Things seem to be going okay here. Once again, no news is good news. Things are still tense and up in the air about some difficulties. But, we'll weather the storm like we always do!
Dating - Hmm...what can I say? I'm dating around, pursuing several options. One in particular stands out above the rest. There are a few that have shown interest and that I may pursue further as well. We'll see what happens as the weeks progress! My goal of at least one date per week is going well. I only set this goal a few months back, so I can't really say I've progressed very far in it. But, even these small baby steps for me is more than I've done normally! We'll see if I get a date on Saturday while out in Denver. My friend is setting me up on a date out there. So, I'll update you if that happens, as well as other dating stories.
School - So, I haven't decided if I'll go back to school sometime in the future or not. I'm kinda burned out with the whole structured school thing. It feels relieving to be done for now. However, I do lack a few online classes to officially finish my second bachelors. But do I do it next semester or not? That's the pivotal question. My fear is I'll procrastinate until the last moment which will mean I won't take the classes this upcoming semester. But, I'm not in a great financial position to really take the needed courses. Alas! What should I do?!?
And that's all I have to say about that...
The beginning of the week started out normal. Church services were great, as always. Good talks and lessons. Definitely need to continually improve and get better. FHE was good. Should have stayed longer but I scheduled a date that night, too. Didn't think FHE would go so long! So, I bailed a bit earlier than expected so I wouldn't be late on a date (Hey! I rhymed!). The date was good. Still have a hard time reading that girl! Not sure if she's interested in going on more dates or not. When I'm with her, it's great! She's so kind and seems interested. But, communicating with her by other means than face-to-face gives me the impression she's not into me as much as I may be into her. Oh well! I'm taking the philosophy of asking until I get a definitive "No" or something to that effect. I'll keep you updated on that. Training at the fire department was fun. We just watched a bunch of training videos to prepare for this weekend's extrication and fire drills. That'll be lots of fun! Did get stuck up at the station for a bit while waiting for the plows to clear the roads. We got a good dumping of snow Tuesday night which continued until Wednesday afternoon. It's weird that it happened so early in the year. Must be global warming (*snicker*)! There weren't any accidents to respond to, though. I'm not sure if I'm happy about that or not. Country dancing was fun! I do enjoy dancing more that I ever thought I would. I invited some of my friends who don't normally go to join me. Only one ended up showing up. I'm glad she showed up. I didn't think she would. She's a busy girl and has lots to do. But it was great that she showed up! A bit perplexed about the whole scenario, but that's a topic I'll have to discuss in private and not on this blog. At least, not in specifics! I also had a job interview on Wednesday with an ambulance service. It's not the ideal job I wanted with my certifications. However, it does pay better than my current job. And, it will be another reference to add to my resume to help land my dream job. That's a definite plus! As well, it will help me pursue a few potential options here in Utah while I try to figure out my interest in these girls while I still have time. The HR lady says they plan on hiring someone. Not really thinking they'll hire a paramedic since they're full of them. But, they are trying to add more to their department. So, that's good. She made it sound like I am their first option when it comes time to hire. But then I've been wrong about that before (South Jordan). Only time will tell what the outcome may be! And that wraps up the week thus far. Have work Friday night, training all day on Saturday, and then fly out to Denver for a job application that night. Will spend Halloween in Denver, which should prove to be interesting. I'll fly back from Denver on Tuesday, just in time to vote. It's weird that I feel such an urge to vote in this election. I feel much more passionate about this election than I have in years past. Why? I can't really point my finger at it. Nevertheless, I will vote and make my voice heard!
Okay. So that's my life for the past week. It sounds rather boring when I reread it. Sorry! Sleep deprivation seems to make me more blunt and less creative. I guess that's what I get for staying up so late and getting up so early! I wish I could get on a more regular schedule! But alas, I want to play too much and yet still have to work to make a living. So, I'll sneak in what little sleep I can when I can find the time to do so. But it appears that may be getting harder and harder to do if I keep taking on so much. Oh! Here are some other updates in my life!
Family - Things are good here. It was Teri and Daniel's birthdays today. Couldn't get ahold of either, so I left them voicemail messages. Hope they got them! Things seem to be going okay here. Once again, no news is good news. Things are still tense and up in the air about some difficulties. But, we'll weather the storm like we always do!
Dating - Hmm...what can I say? I'm dating around, pursuing several options. One in particular stands out above the rest. There are a few that have shown interest and that I may pursue further as well. We'll see what happens as the weeks progress! My goal of at least one date per week is going well. I only set this goal a few months back, so I can't really say I've progressed very far in it. But, even these small baby steps for me is more than I've done normally! We'll see if I get a date on Saturday while out in Denver. My friend is setting me up on a date out there. So, I'll update you if that happens, as well as other dating stories.
School - So, I haven't decided if I'll go back to school sometime in the future or not. I'm kinda burned out with the whole structured school thing. It feels relieving to be done for now. However, I do lack a few online classes to officially finish my second bachelors. But do I do it next semester or not? That's the pivotal question. My fear is I'll procrastinate until the last moment which will mean I won't take the classes this upcoming semester. But, I'm not in a great financial position to really take the needed courses. Alas! What should I do?!?
And that's all I have to say about that...
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Patience is a virtue...
So, I've come to realize lately that I've got more weaknesses than I'd like to admit. Before I get too in-depth with this topic, I want to clarify that in no way am I depressed and/or moping. I'm happy and content with the way things are going thus far in my life. There could be some course corrections here and there which will get me closer to my destination. However, I'm enjoying the journey!
So, about these apparent weaknesses...
I'm realizing each day that patience is not a virtue that I possess loads of. Whether it be work, school, dating, careers, family life, or any other situation, I get impatient rather easily. I'd like to blame it on society and say that they've made me into the creature that I am. However, that's using a scapegoat and not owning up to the person really responsible for my behavior (which is me). I cannot blame anyone else but myself for the way I act. I've noticed lately that my career and dating pursuits have made my impatience more and more evident to my own view. Now, maybe I'm my own worst critic in this situation. However, I think there's a lot of truth to the perspective that I have. I want things to happen on my timeline. I have a difficult time patiently waiting for things to happen the way I want. For example, I applied to a job with a certain department. They eventually called back and we went through the whole interview process. They promised that they'd have an answer in about two weeks. I was able to patiently wait those two weeks, although I hoped I wouldn't have to. It's now been well over two months and still no response. I know they've hired one guy who's still in school. He should finish up in early April. But, there were two positions open. Who'd they get to fill the other position? Or did they not fill it at all? I want to hear from them and just know whether or not the position was filled. I won't be heartbroken if they say no. At this point in time, I just assume that the answer is no. But, it's been hard for me to patiently wait on an answer from them. Is that bad of me? Another example of my impatience is in dating. I want things to happen now. It's hard for me to sit by the phone, waiting for the girl to call back. I admit that I'm not the greatest at immediately returning calls and texts. But, I do make a concerted effort to return the call or text as quickly as I can. I think it's just common courtesy to do so. But then, I've been called "old-fashioned" in many of my views. I'm trying to remain optimistic and force myself to learn this lesson of patience. I'm doing okay with it. But, I've got a long way to go before I can call it a strength...
Another wonderful virtue I lack which has been made apparent to me is my self-mutilation ploy that is so common in my conversations. I don't consider myself anything spectacular and it comes out in my conversations. Several girls have called me out on this matter. I consider myself an average guy with several talents. Nothing spectacular or amazing. Nothing where I excel beyond my peers. But, I do think I'm unique in my varied interests and likes. I'm okay at dancing, sports, work, church, school, manual labor, and a whole host of other things. There are many that excel far beyond my skill level. And, I do acknowledge that there are others who haven't reached the level of comfort that I have. There will always be those who are better and worse than I am. That's a given in life and makes this world special. A few close female friends have called me out on this ploy while dancing. They chide me about how my skills are much better than I admit to and that I should be out dancing on the floor more than I do. I just realize what I have and know that there are others out there who are far more gifted. I'm trying to work on this whole self-confidence thing and be more comfortable with who I am and what I've been given. I'd like to consider myself a more humble and reserved guy when it comes to admitting my talents. I thank God that I have been given so many. But, how do I express these gifts without coming across cocky or proud?
So, I guess that's enough of that string of conversation. On to the updates!
Umm...well...updates? I just realized that there's not really much to update the world on. Not much really has changed this past week. I did get to spend a few hours talking to a close friend. And that was awesome! I haven't seen her since she came home from her mission earlier this year. We've talked a couple times since she's been home but haven't seen each other until this past week. Glad that I could spend some time with her and get updates on her life. Family life seems a bit strained this week. Several things have gone on which has increased the stress in my immediate family's life. Not sure what to do right now but pray. I'm starting to feel a bit ostracized when it comes to updates in my own family. I think they're worried about how I'll take the news. I know they know that I care about my family and want the best for them. I think they just don't want to trouble me with the news anymore. It's not like I can do much from out here anyway. But that doesn't prevent me from worrying about them. Maybe they think that since I'm so removed from the situation that I don't fully comprehend it all. Who knows?!?
Well, that's about all my ramblings for the night. Sorry if it bores you! I'm happy that I'm learning and doing what I do, though. Yay for life's lessons!
So, about these apparent weaknesses...
I'm realizing each day that patience is not a virtue that I possess loads of. Whether it be work, school, dating, careers, family life, or any other situation, I get impatient rather easily. I'd like to blame it on society and say that they've made me into the creature that I am. However, that's using a scapegoat and not owning up to the person really responsible for my behavior (which is me). I cannot blame anyone else but myself for the way I act. I've noticed lately that my career and dating pursuits have made my impatience more and more evident to my own view. Now, maybe I'm my own worst critic in this situation. However, I think there's a lot of truth to the perspective that I have. I want things to happen on my timeline. I have a difficult time patiently waiting for things to happen the way I want. For example, I applied to a job with a certain department. They eventually called back and we went through the whole interview process. They promised that they'd have an answer in about two weeks. I was able to patiently wait those two weeks, although I hoped I wouldn't have to. It's now been well over two months and still no response. I know they've hired one guy who's still in school. He should finish up in early April. But, there were two positions open. Who'd they get to fill the other position? Or did they not fill it at all? I want to hear from them and just know whether or not the position was filled. I won't be heartbroken if they say no. At this point in time, I just assume that the answer is no. But, it's been hard for me to patiently wait on an answer from them. Is that bad of me? Another example of my impatience is in dating. I want things to happen now. It's hard for me to sit by the phone, waiting for the girl to call back. I admit that I'm not the greatest at immediately returning calls and texts. But, I do make a concerted effort to return the call or text as quickly as I can. I think it's just common courtesy to do so. But then, I've been called "old-fashioned" in many of my views. I'm trying to remain optimistic and force myself to learn this lesson of patience. I'm doing okay with it. But, I've got a long way to go before I can call it a strength...
Another wonderful virtue I lack which has been made apparent to me is my self-mutilation ploy that is so common in my conversations. I don't consider myself anything spectacular and it comes out in my conversations. Several girls have called me out on this matter. I consider myself an average guy with several talents. Nothing spectacular or amazing. Nothing where I excel beyond my peers. But, I do think I'm unique in my varied interests and likes. I'm okay at dancing, sports, work, church, school, manual labor, and a whole host of other things. There are many that excel far beyond my skill level. And, I do acknowledge that there are others who haven't reached the level of comfort that I have. There will always be those who are better and worse than I am. That's a given in life and makes this world special. A few close female friends have called me out on this ploy while dancing. They chide me about how my skills are much better than I admit to and that I should be out dancing on the floor more than I do. I just realize what I have and know that there are others out there who are far more gifted. I'm trying to work on this whole self-confidence thing and be more comfortable with who I am and what I've been given. I'd like to consider myself a more humble and reserved guy when it comes to admitting my talents. I thank God that I have been given so many. But, how do I express these gifts without coming across cocky or proud?
So, I guess that's enough of that string of conversation. On to the updates!
Umm...well...updates? I just realized that there's not really much to update the world on. Not much really has changed this past week. I did get to spend a few hours talking to a close friend. And that was awesome! I haven't seen her since she came home from her mission earlier this year. We've talked a couple times since she's been home but haven't seen each other until this past week. Glad that I could spend some time with her and get updates on her life. Family life seems a bit strained this week. Several things have gone on which has increased the stress in my immediate family's life. Not sure what to do right now but pray. I'm starting to feel a bit ostracized when it comes to updates in my own family. I think they're worried about how I'll take the news. I know they know that I care about my family and want the best for them. I think they just don't want to trouble me with the news anymore. It's not like I can do much from out here anyway. But that doesn't prevent me from worrying about them. Maybe they think that since I'm so removed from the situation that I don't fully comprehend it all. Who knows?!?
Well, that's about all my ramblings for the night. Sorry if it bores you! I'm happy that I'm learning and doing what I do, though. Yay for life's lessons!
Sunday, October 17, 2010
At another crossroad in life...
So, I'm trying to be a bit more consistent with this whole writing-and-updating thing. I've been told this is how several people keep up with the events of my life since I don't call regularly. With that in mind, I'm trying to turn over a new leaf and write semi-regularly on my blog. It will be interesting to see the reactions I get if I keep writing in this thing. Maybe laughter? Ridicule? Surprise? Sometimes I'm not sure if people really want to know what I'm thinking. But alas, here are my ramblings for tonight...
First off, work was exhausting this week! And trying! Supposedly, the resort is going into a "slow time" right now. Since the summer season is over and the winter season has yet to begin, we're in a sort of transition phase at the resort. This is a normal thing for resorts like us. Nothing unusual about it. However, I keep hearing that we'll be slow. This weekend was anything but slow! We had a large group here of about 125. Most of them were from the East Coast. Of course, this is a different mentality than that of the West Coast people. Luckily, that wasn't too much of a factor. The whole resort was bustling with activity, trying to tailor to the needs of the group. And boy was this group needy! All of us around the resort were consistently running around with demands and needs of the guests. Each night I found myself spending the majority of the night trying to answer the many varied requests of our guests. Many of these requests were absurd and odd, but I did all that I could to meet them to the best of my abilities. They definitely tried my patience on several occasions. I guess it was a good experience for me in the fact that I learned how to become better at customer service. I just wish they weren't so demanding at times! But, I've survived thus far. Only a few more hours before this week's shifts are over. Then it really gets slow at the resort. Not sure what I'll do with my time when there's absolutely no one around here. Maybe pick up reading books again???
So, I fly out to Denver the end of this month to start the application process there for fire jobs. My buddy thinks I have a good chance of getting hired out there. I have my doubts since very few places I've heard of are hiring anybody. Maybe I'm a bit jaded after applying for so many jobs up to this point who say they'll hire but end up not doing a thing. My thoughts are that I'll believe it when I see it. I'm trying to be optimistic despite obvious sentiments of pessimism, but I'm not sure how optimistic I can remain in this difficult economy. Nonetheless, I'm going to try and get hired somewhere! Denver seems like an excellent place to work. Many friends have given me glowing reviews of the city and say how much they think I'll love it there. I'm a bit nervous about it all since I've been out here for so long now. I do enjoy a good adventure and will adjust quite quickly to a new environment/setting. Still, there does come some uncertainties when moving to a new town. I think I'd really enjoy myself out in Denver. Especially if I got a job out there. It would be a relief to finally start into a career. But I've grown so accustomed to life here that I know it won't be easy to leave all this behind. I've got so many good friends here that I would hate to leave behind. I'm sure I could make just as many in a new place, though. It will be hard to change, but maybe that's the only way I can learn, grow, mature, and get further in life. Maybe a move to Denver is just what I need! I guess we'll see what happens after the test on the 1st...
I'm starting to realize as I get older (which is kinda odd to say) I have grown to appreciate my family even more. I've always been very independent and do my own thing with little involvement from my family. Moving away from my family after my mission was not a difficult thing to do. But as I've lived out here, I've begun to miss my family even more. I don't get to see them very often since they're so far away from me. I might get to see them about every other year or so. I guess I shouldn't complain too much about it though. At least they're not in a different country! Still, I wish I could afford to see them more. Time and money are two things that I have very little of. So, I don't see them as often as I should. I've been trying to call my family more regularly. And that's not something I've been good at. In fact, I still struggle to do so. But with practice comes confidence and increased ability. And that's what I'm hoping for! I'm also trying to visit extended family more often since some of them are closer than my immediate family. Although not exactly like my immediate family, the love I feel there is good enough to get me through life. Family has become a major priority in life. Their importance in my life has increased with time. I can't point to any specifics, but the need for closeness with family members has increased as I grow older. Oh, how I love my family!
Socially, I'm still trying to get back in the saddle. Dating was never a strong point in my life. But with practice come confidence and growth. So, I've been trying to date more. Haven't had the greatest of success yet. I still consider myself inexperienced in the game of dating. I've gone on several dates this month. Nothing spectacular. Just some simple dates. I'm happy now that I'm dating again. It's something I know I need to do more of. And, I need to move on with my life. And my fear of dating is something I feel is holding me back from reaching my full potential. I'll update you later on if there's any significant "distractions" that catch my focus!!!
Obviously, you can tell what a couple of my major "crossroads" are in life curerntly: dating and a career. I have to admit that there are a couple girls who catch my fancy and that I'd love to date. At least, I think they'd be pretty fun to get to know better. But only through dating will I find out if there's more to it than just first impressions. The career hunt, however, is causing some conflict on how I date. I'm really focused on finding a career. I want to get started with that aspect of my life. However, I know that finding a wife is an even higher priority. Now, I'm not saying that there's only one place where I can find that special someone. I'm sure I could find one just about anywhere in this world. However, the statistical advantage here in Utah is definitely in a guy's favor. It's hard not to enjoy the ratio of guys-to-girls out here. And although this is putting the cart before the horse, I'm kinda scared to start a relationship with a girl here. Why? Because I don't want to start something here in Utah only to end it because I'm moving elsewhere. Sure, I guess I could help the relationship move along such that she's willing to move with me elsewhere. But I feel that in order to do that, I should probably have helped the relationship to have progressed far enough that marriage is the end result. I feel it's too much to ask a girl to move somewhere with me just on the hopes that it will turn out that way. Now take in mind that I know several girls who have done that. A good friend did it and now she's happy engaged to the man of her dreams. And I think that's awesome! But, I feel that it's an awful lot to ask of a girl. Sure, I should let her make that decision. It's not like I would force her to make that decision. Ultimately, it's her decision anyways to move and take that chance. I just feel bad even thinking I'd have to put a girl in that kind of predicament. Thus, I'm scared (at least to a certain extent) to start something here. I did take a girl on a date last week that I think would be open to discussing that idea. By no means are we at a point in our friendship that I would ask that of her. However if it were to progress to that point, I'm still not so sure I could ask that of her. It's a lot to ask of anybody. If I were married and had a wife, moving would be an easier option. At least, I think it would be easier. I would be able to counsel with her about the move and work it out that way because we'd both have to move together. Sure, making the decision as a single guy is easier since I only have to worry about myself. But, I'd hate to have a great relationship developed only to end it with a move to another place. Am I being weird about this? Am I stressing about something that is so inconsequential? Am I stressing about something that isn't even worth it? i guess I'll cross that bridge when I get there. Until then, I'll just worry about myself and see what I can do to make things happen in my life. But what if...
First off, work was exhausting this week! And trying! Supposedly, the resort is going into a "slow time" right now. Since the summer season is over and the winter season has yet to begin, we're in a sort of transition phase at the resort. This is a normal thing for resorts like us. Nothing unusual about it. However, I keep hearing that we'll be slow. This weekend was anything but slow! We had a large group here of about 125. Most of them were from the East Coast. Of course, this is a different mentality than that of the West Coast people. Luckily, that wasn't too much of a factor. The whole resort was bustling with activity, trying to tailor to the needs of the group. And boy was this group needy! All of us around the resort were consistently running around with demands and needs of the guests. Each night I found myself spending the majority of the night trying to answer the many varied requests of our guests. Many of these requests were absurd and odd, but I did all that I could to meet them to the best of my abilities. They definitely tried my patience on several occasions. I guess it was a good experience for me in the fact that I learned how to become better at customer service. I just wish they weren't so demanding at times! But, I've survived thus far. Only a few more hours before this week's shifts are over. Then it really gets slow at the resort. Not sure what I'll do with my time when there's absolutely no one around here. Maybe pick up reading books again???
So, I fly out to Denver the end of this month to start the application process there for fire jobs. My buddy thinks I have a good chance of getting hired out there. I have my doubts since very few places I've heard of are hiring anybody. Maybe I'm a bit jaded after applying for so many jobs up to this point who say they'll hire but end up not doing a thing. My thoughts are that I'll believe it when I see it. I'm trying to be optimistic despite obvious sentiments of pessimism, but I'm not sure how optimistic I can remain in this difficult economy. Nonetheless, I'm going to try and get hired somewhere! Denver seems like an excellent place to work. Many friends have given me glowing reviews of the city and say how much they think I'll love it there. I'm a bit nervous about it all since I've been out here for so long now. I do enjoy a good adventure and will adjust quite quickly to a new environment/setting. Still, there does come some uncertainties when moving to a new town. I think I'd really enjoy myself out in Denver. Especially if I got a job out there. It would be a relief to finally start into a career. But I've grown so accustomed to life here that I know it won't be easy to leave all this behind. I've got so many good friends here that I would hate to leave behind. I'm sure I could make just as many in a new place, though. It will be hard to change, but maybe that's the only way I can learn, grow, mature, and get further in life. Maybe a move to Denver is just what I need! I guess we'll see what happens after the test on the 1st...
I'm starting to realize as I get older (which is kinda odd to say) I have grown to appreciate my family even more. I've always been very independent and do my own thing with little involvement from my family. Moving away from my family after my mission was not a difficult thing to do. But as I've lived out here, I've begun to miss my family even more. I don't get to see them very often since they're so far away from me. I might get to see them about every other year or so. I guess I shouldn't complain too much about it though. At least they're not in a different country! Still, I wish I could afford to see them more. Time and money are two things that I have very little of. So, I don't see them as often as I should. I've been trying to call my family more regularly. And that's not something I've been good at. In fact, I still struggle to do so. But with practice comes confidence and increased ability. And that's what I'm hoping for! I'm also trying to visit extended family more often since some of them are closer than my immediate family. Although not exactly like my immediate family, the love I feel there is good enough to get me through life. Family has become a major priority in life. Their importance in my life has increased with time. I can't point to any specifics, but the need for closeness with family members has increased as I grow older. Oh, how I love my family!
Socially, I'm still trying to get back in the saddle. Dating was never a strong point in my life. But with practice come confidence and growth. So, I've been trying to date more. Haven't had the greatest of success yet. I still consider myself inexperienced in the game of dating. I've gone on several dates this month. Nothing spectacular. Just some simple dates. I'm happy now that I'm dating again. It's something I know I need to do more of. And, I need to move on with my life. And my fear of dating is something I feel is holding me back from reaching my full potential. I'll update you later on if there's any significant "distractions" that catch my focus!!!
Obviously, you can tell what a couple of my major "crossroads" are in life curerntly: dating and a career. I have to admit that there are a couple girls who catch my fancy and that I'd love to date. At least, I think they'd be pretty fun to get to know better. But only through dating will I find out if there's more to it than just first impressions. The career hunt, however, is causing some conflict on how I date. I'm really focused on finding a career. I want to get started with that aspect of my life. However, I know that finding a wife is an even higher priority. Now, I'm not saying that there's only one place where I can find that special someone. I'm sure I could find one just about anywhere in this world. However, the statistical advantage here in Utah is definitely in a guy's favor. It's hard not to enjoy the ratio of guys-to-girls out here. And although this is putting the cart before the horse, I'm kinda scared to start a relationship with a girl here. Why? Because I don't want to start something here in Utah only to end it because I'm moving elsewhere. Sure, I guess I could help the relationship move along such that she's willing to move with me elsewhere. But I feel that in order to do that, I should probably have helped the relationship to have progressed far enough that marriage is the end result. I feel it's too much to ask a girl to move somewhere with me just on the hopes that it will turn out that way. Now take in mind that I know several girls who have done that. A good friend did it and now she's happy engaged to the man of her dreams. And I think that's awesome! But, I feel that it's an awful lot to ask of a girl. Sure, I should let her make that decision. It's not like I would force her to make that decision. Ultimately, it's her decision anyways to move and take that chance. I just feel bad even thinking I'd have to put a girl in that kind of predicament. Thus, I'm scared (at least to a certain extent) to start something here. I did take a girl on a date last week that I think would be open to discussing that idea. By no means are we at a point in our friendship that I would ask that of her. However if it were to progress to that point, I'm still not so sure I could ask that of her. It's a lot to ask of anybody. If I were married and had a wife, moving would be an easier option. At least, I think it would be easier. I would be able to counsel with her about the move and work it out that way because we'd both have to move together. Sure, making the decision as a single guy is easier since I only have to worry about myself. But, I'd hate to have a great relationship developed only to end it with a move to another place. Am I being weird about this? Am I stressing about something that is so inconsequential? Am I stressing about something that isn't even worth it? i guess I'll cross that bridge when I get there. Until then, I'll just worry about myself and see what I can do to make things happen in my life. But what if...
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Thoughts of the day...
Hmm...where to begin? Once again, I neglect to update my worthy followers on the ever chaotic (but sometimes boring) life of Tyler. I have this nasty habit of not communicating much with the outside world. Kinda a loner in that way. But alas, I'm doing my best to overcome this shortcoming! Onward and upward!
Now that I've finished school, I can no longer comment about it. Learning is something I enjoy, but I've grown uncomfortable with the structure of school. After being in school for so long, it's time for a break! And I'm glad of it! I was beginning to get a bit burned out with school. The excitement and motivation of attending school had begun to wane and I had very little motivation to go each day. That's a glaring sign that it's time to be done! At least, for a little while...
Work is work. There have been a lot of changes in the way things have been run at work. Not directly in my department but more of the overall business. A lot of people have been upset with some of the decisions that upper management has made and chosen to pursue. I'm caught between a rock and a hard place. I don't always agree with the direction that the business is taking, but my job depends on my support of management. So, I keep my job by supporting management in hopes that they understand the full extent of their decisions. If not, the consequences are upon their heads. I hope it all goes well! I'm still on the hunt for a paramedic job somewhere in the western US. I'll fly out to a test the end of this month. We'll see how that goes! A lot of my friends here aren't too happy about my moving. I have created a nice social network out here. But, I must pursue the best option for my chosen career. And wherever that is, I must follow. And if that means moving outside of my happy little bubble here, then so be it. I do like adventure and haven't shied away too much at a new experience. I've just become very comfortable in my current circumstances. What will be the outcome? Only time will tell!
Family life remains the same. My bond with my parents and youngest sibling seem to grow with each passing week. Who would have thought that I'd become closer to my youngest brother than with my other siblings? I certainly never would have foreseen it! I call home on a pretty regular basis, getting advice and updates. I do wish I could see my family more often. If only time and distance (and money) didn't' separate us so much! Still haven't heard much from my other three siblings. I sure hope they're doing ok. My mom says she hasn't heard much from them either, so I don't feel as bad. It's better to know I'm not the only one out of the loop when it comes to updates on the family!
My social life is slowly increasing. I've finally gotten more spare time and have made improving my social network a top priority. I've become more of a social butterfly than I ever thought I would be. I guess that's what living in the dorms for three years does to you! It's been an uphill battle trying to keep motivated to visit friends despite being so tired and worn down. I've neglected my friendships for far too long and I can see the signs of decay. But, I'm doing my best to resolve that! We'll see what the next post will bring in this area of my so-called life...
I'm learning how much I love my life up in the mountains! What a breathtaking scene to see each morning as I wake up! My dad was right: he did lose me to the mountains! I absolutely love it here! It's so green and magnificent! Even with the fall approaching and the colors changing, it's still a magnificent sight to see!
I LOVE MY LIFE!!!
Monday, June 21, 2010
It's been awhile....
Wow! It's been awhile since I've sat down and actually written on this thing! Scary! I've been so busy the last year or so that I haven't had time to slow down and reflect on my life. Reflection is a good thing every now and again. It verifies that you're on the path that you want to be! So this is me coming up for air...
School. What can I say about it? It's consumed my life. Everything and anything I do currently has some tie (whether small or big) to school. I can't believe I've been in school this long. I'm going on 7 years now in college. And all I'll have to show for it will be two bachelor's degrees. I guess that's not bad. Would be nice if I could quickly add a job to the accomplishments attached with graduating. But, only time will tell if that's true or not! Don't get me wrong, I love learning! It's fun to challenge yourself and open your eyes to new possibilities. And trust me, I've learned A LOT over the past few years! It's been good. Currently, most of that information is a jumbled mess inside my head. I need to sort and file all of it and try and make it into some semblance of order. Do you think I could hire a secretary to do that for me???
Work is a thing that I know very little of currently. School literally runs my life. So, I'm not able to work consistently every week. I try and get at least two shifts a week. Sometimes I'm successful. Sometimes I'm less than perfect. My bank account reflects the fact that I haven't worked very much recently. I think I've got an average balance of $1.25 for the last few months. Luckily, I'm not homeless just yet. As school wraps up, hopefully I can pick up some overtime along the way and augment the last few months of debt. Sundance is still a gorgeous place. I still do enjoy working here each and every chance I get. I realize that it's probably not a career option for me to remain here. But, it will get me through until I find that opportunity.
Family life is chaotic. Much has happened. More than I'd like to include in this blog. Between losing an uncle to a heart attack, having a mom and brother suffer some medical issues, having a sister go off the deep end, and having my own health teetering, things have been, I guess you would say, hectic. I'm ever so grateful for the bond that I have with my family and being able to step back occasionally and see the bigger picture. Otherwise, there would be many justifiable reasons not to associate with them. But, I sure do love them, despite all of our faults! In reality, they're the glue that keeps me together. Without them, I would have fallen apart long ago. Thank God that I have a great family!
Hmm...I'm not sure what else to write. There's nothing really pressing that I feel the need to write at the moment. I'm sure there's something amazing or exciting that I could post on here. Maybe it's my lack of sleep that's hampering me from writing more. Until next time...
School. What can I say about it? It's consumed my life. Everything and anything I do currently has some tie (whether small or big) to school. I can't believe I've been in school this long. I'm going on 7 years now in college. And all I'll have to show for it will be two bachelor's degrees. I guess that's not bad. Would be nice if I could quickly add a job to the accomplishments attached with graduating. But, only time will tell if that's true or not! Don't get me wrong, I love learning! It's fun to challenge yourself and open your eyes to new possibilities. And trust me, I've learned A LOT over the past few years! It's been good. Currently, most of that information is a jumbled mess inside my head. I need to sort and file all of it and try and make it into some semblance of order. Do you think I could hire a secretary to do that for me???
Work is a thing that I know very little of currently. School literally runs my life. So, I'm not able to work consistently every week. I try and get at least two shifts a week. Sometimes I'm successful. Sometimes I'm less than perfect. My bank account reflects the fact that I haven't worked very much recently. I think I've got an average balance of $1.25 for the last few months. Luckily, I'm not homeless just yet. As school wraps up, hopefully I can pick up some overtime along the way and augment the last few months of debt. Sundance is still a gorgeous place. I still do enjoy working here each and every chance I get. I realize that it's probably not a career option for me to remain here. But, it will get me through until I find that opportunity.
Family life is chaotic. Much has happened. More than I'd like to include in this blog. Between losing an uncle to a heart attack, having a mom and brother suffer some medical issues, having a sister go off the deep end, and having my own health teetering, things have been, I guess you would say, hectic. I'm ever so grateful for the bond that I have with my family and being able to step back occasionally and see the bigger picture. Otherwise, there would be many justifiable reasons not to associate with them. But, I sure do love them, despite all of our faults! In reality, they're the glue that keeps me together. Without them, I would have fallen apart long ago. Thank God that I have a great family!
Hmm...I'm not sure what else to write. There's nothing really pressing that I feel the need to write at the moment. I'm sure there's something amazing or exciting that I could post on here. Maybe it's my lack of sleep that's hampering me from writing more. Until next time...
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